Anatomy of a Start
by tristelamar
Summary: "Her whole being halts to a complete stop for a beat at the words, and then she's inwardly scrambling for the fastest path toward the ability to think logically. " A story about a turning point in Seol - Chan's and Se - Yi's ongoing love story. A "Monstar" ficlet.


Anatomy of a Start

Today might go down in history as one of the best five days that ever happened to Se – Yi. The other four days are all tinted in past, but today simply vibrates with the promise of the future. There are streamers still on the floor because she passed the exam, which means she really is a music teacher now. A school, any school, just has to grab her. And, in the meantime, she's stopped cleaning up so she can properly make out with Seol - Chan, the one who arranged the surprise party for her after hearing the news about the results.

Her happiness pours into it as they kiss, but it's not one of those kisses where she's smiling against that wonderful mouth of his. Hers is the deepest sort of happiness, the buzzing-soul-to-warm-skin kind of full bliss, and so the kiss reflects that. It's all encompassing and at once searching and slow, all deep angles that leave her chest feeling too heated, her legs feeling too liquid, and so it's particularly good that at some point he backed her against the wall.

He steps closer against her as he moves to worry down on her bottom lip, his teeth causing havoc as he exerts just the right amount of pressure against the sensitive skin there, his fingers grabbing at the fabric of her shirt behind her, bunching it up in a fistful as she lets out this needy, breathy sound that would have been embarrassing some years ago. They are so good at this, at kissing like this. Se - Yi can count with her fingers the amount of times they've done this since they finally got back together three months ago, but every time they get this close she spends the rest of the week getting lost in daydreams and having too vivid flashbacks at almost every possible turn.

She lets her fingers smooth up and down his back, his soft shirt the only thing separating her from his spine, her other hand lost in his hair, holding on, charting the delicious trajectory of their long mouth to mouth. She thinks it's one of Seol – Chan's most annoyingly endearing qualities: that he considers this to be the one and only acceptable reason to ever walk around with a messy head for however short while it takes for him to smooth his hair back into style.

She licks the roof of his mouth as they go back to kissing fully, still with that almost leisurely tempo, loving it when his grab on her shirt becomes stronger in response, loving that he's become more open and less tightly controlled over the years. Heaven, _this man_. She really does love him in every way possible.

She can barely remember how to suck air into her lungs when their kiss comes to an end, a state that seems to be echoed by Seol - Chan: he's breathing in deep as he rests his forehead against hers, thumb brushing over her left temple softly.

"You need to marry me, Se – Yi," he says on his next breath.

Her whole being halts to a complete stop for a beat at the words, and then she's inwardly scrambling for the fastest path toward the ability to think logically. The silence stretches as they stay like they are, sharing touch and proximity, and Se - Yi knows with certainty that, whether he's been thinking about it for weeks or whether it's just occurred to him, it's not something he'll take back. He means it. He's asking.

She swallows as she searches her heart: being his friend and trying (and failing) to not fall in love with him back at school, that year of being with him while Men in Black was still together (the good parts and the parts that led to the break), the three-and-a-half years of being careful friends, and then, finally, their taking their chance again, having it work so well now that he's a music producer and gets to do what he loves without having to war so much with the notoriety of it.

She can't say she hasn't fantasized about what he's asking. Having him as a certainty, indefinitely keeping on their casual tradition of him fixing dessert while she prepares the main dish, getting to hear his morning-raspy voice without there being a cellphone involved, learning what all the buzz is about when it comes to make-up sex, sex, talking and laughing, and sometimes screaming and crying out this life together.

A part of Se – Yi wants to make a lighthearted joke when she arrives at her answer perhaps fifteen seconds later, but Seol – Chan is funny flairs with a densely serious core: entirely serious unless he's obviously trying to make you laugh.

So she doesn't make that joke. Instead she touches him as she gathers some distance so that she can look into him, his face, his eyes. When she talks, her voice is strong like the answer inside her feels strong, -"Yes," she says, a world of emotion in the single whisper.

The expression that settles over Seol – Chan's face is enough to erase even the shadow of a battle: today is simply the best day that ever happened to Se- Yi. As he pulls her into him and picks her up for a spinning hug, she smiles against his neck and tells herself to keep everything about just now in the safest corner of her being, because she's irredeemably certain that it'll always serve to melt the harshness out of even the roughest storms that will inevitably come their way.

~oOo~


End file.
